EASTENDERS (CLOSE TO THE EDGE)
by covblazebabe
Summary: Carol and David reluctantly return to the square as a couple, but as always nothing is quite as it seems, a bombshell soon hits them, one that will change their lives forever.
1. Chapter 1

Eastenders new

Hello people here's a new eastenders fanfic, David and Carol return to the square, references to current and recent storylines will be included, hope you enjoy reading, please review or comment if you have the time.

Chapter one

Our tale opens on an old wooden bench 'in memory of Arthur Fowler' was written on a plaque pinned to the bench, Phil sat clutching a bottle of vodka, he Downs a few mouthfuls and looks around.

The cold evening was making him shiver, Sharon had kindly asked him to leave and sober up, she had opened up the family laptop and found a page left open, Phils drinking had got to an all time low, his life was now slipping away, but he didn't seem to care, unbeknown to her Phil had deliberately not deleted the search history, he kept looking around thinking about his life, he soon heard the soft sounds of a motorbike far in the distance.

He took to his feet and moved to the fence, a motorbike pulled up outside the Jackson residence, when the helmets came off Phil gasped as he saw Carol and David dismount from the bike.

"Unbelievable" he muttered downing some more drink, he watched Carol and David embrace one and other before entering the house, this made him jealous, how could they still be together? He stumbles over launching the bottle through the window, letting out a sarcastic laugh before falling over.

David raced outside and stood looking at Phil, his hands sunk deep into his pockets "back on the booze Phil?" He questions "not a lot ever changes round here"

Phil glanced up at him and let out a somewhat evil laugh, David kindly helped him to his feet and ventured back inside.

"well that was a nice welcome home present" he muttered bending down to gather the larger bits of glass that were covering the floor.

"David, I really don't think this was a good idea, this place holds to many bad memories"

"oh come on Carol we don't have to stay forever" said David in his usual calming tone.

Carol shrugged unconvinced, the last few months had been full of risks for her, when she left the square she travelled around to old haunts, relived memories and then went in search of David, lucky for her, he hadn't be difficult to track down.

To come to the end of a time of anxiety and fear, to feel the dark cloud that hung over us lift and disperse - the grim cloud that dulled the heart and made happiness no more than a memory!

Carol's dark cloud had been the cancer, she didn't like to admit it, but it had changed her in so many ways, the diagnosis, the treatment, and then the joy of having that cloud removed from her life.

It was enough to break even the strongest person.

"are you alright darling?" questioned David as he swept the floor "you look a bit pale"

"I'm fine, just tired" she answered sharply exiting the room.

David sighed and continued clearing up, he was still in shock from carol turning up, since leaving he had done very well for himself, he had started his own business in Spain, possibly why carol found it easy to track him down.

She had followed him to a near by bar and strolled over as if nothing had happened, of course David found this a bit strange, he had assumed perhaps she had been given some bad news, or maybe she was losing her mind, he couldn't bring himself to accept that it was possible she really did love him and regretted sending him away, it was too good to be true.

The two had spent days and nights together and eventually had become a couple again, it was carol who suggested returning to the square, she had claimed her head was sorted and clear.

David on the other hand despite his disapproval had quite simply agreed, he had only just got her back he wasn't about to rock the boat just yet, plus he saw himself as a bit of wanderer.

He kept reminding himself that in such situations it was better he kept his trap shut and just went along with Carol's ideas and demands, he was starting to quite like it

"David I'm going to bed" shouted carol as she headed up the stairs.

"not even a goodnight kiss" grunted David, he shrugged it off and sorted out the window before heading up and settling in beside her.

The following morning a spirit of happy mischief entered into David, he felt just the same as he had on the morning carol had confessed her love for him, he felt confident and ready for adventure.

He glanced over at Carol who was still sound asleep, he pecked her cheek hoping she would stir, no such luck, why did we actually come back here? He wondered.

Looking back it was just a last minute decision fueled by to many jugs of sangria.

Still they were here now.

He turned back to Carol and tried nudging her with his nose but that didn't seem to work either.

"Carol!" he shouted.

She opened one eye and shook her head "I'm trying to sleep!" she snapped "stop nudging me and wailing like that!"

After her bite back she turned over and pulled the cover off him.

"charming" muttered David

It was clear he wasn't going to be getting his end away this morning so he vacated the room and headed to the shower, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and smiled, standing there alone he tilted head and noticed the dark shadows below his eyes.

This was no surprise, he hadn't been sleeping properly of late, nor had carol, the two of them had had quite an adventure.

"you can't keep looking back, you have to keep running" he muttered to his tanned handsome reflection.

After sorting himself out he looked in on Carol who had fallen back to sleep.

He sighs and heads downstairs, the house was quiet, not something he was use to, he made himself some toast and sat at the table, his mind soon began to wonder, he began replying old memories, this house, this whole place held so many memories, not particularly good ones either.

Himself and carol had been through so much together, they had hurt each other, loved each other, always ended up together yet things had never worked out right.

Maybe this time would be different he thought.

He was subdued and a little doubtful at heart, like the pain of a bad wound, the effect of a deep shock takes sometime time to be felt, but he was feeling it now.

Only a day after his heart attack carol had dumped him, her actions had hurt him more than any other time she had chosen to finish with him, because at that point he was actually truly and deeply in love with her and willing to commit and change his life in anyway he could.

Glancing at his watch he realised half the day had somehow past him by, he decided to go for stroll round the square, see if anything had changed.

Of course not much had changed, saw a crowd of depressed looking humans stumbling helplessly through their daily lives.

The place was indeed different to when he was younger, he chuckled thinking about it.

He looked to his left and spotted Phil rummaging through some bins, he also appeared to be having some kind of disagreement with a stray tabby cat who was also most interested in the bins "fishing for something are we!" he shouted flippantly' Phil glanced over and gave a half hearted shrug before returning to his business.

"David wicks" came a familiar voice from behind him "what brings you back here?"

...

There's your first chapter guys, hope you like it, more coming soon, thanks for reading, please review/comment etc if you can, I'd love to read your thoughts.

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	2. Chapter 2

Close to the edge

chapter 2

Here is chapter two people, hope you enjoy reading.

Chapter two

David spun round to be confronted by Sharon, he smiled "ello darling" he said with a grin "Your looking well, can't say the same for your man over there, haven't you been feeding him?"

Sharon sighed, she was finding it hard to choke back the tears "he's not my man anymore" she stated in a firm voice glancing over at Phil still attacking the bins "I don't think he ever was truly mine, he always looks after number one"

David felt a bit sorry for Sharon, she was a good strong lady yet right now she looked so deflated.

"I've been a wild rover for many's a year,

And I've spent all my money on whiskey and beer

And now I'm returning with gold in great store,

And I never will play the wild rover no more

And it's no, nay, never!

No nay never no more

And I'll play the wild rover,

No never no more..." sang Phil as he clutched the tabby cat under one arm and waved a half drank bottle he had found in the trash with his free hand.

David led Sharon away, they walked and talked for a few hours about Phil and his drinking, about Sharons troubled family life, David wished he could have said something to make her feel better, but he couldn't, she seemed happy he was listening so that was enough for him.

Later that evening over dinner carol seemed very quiet, it was almost as if she was in another world, she sat moving the food about the plate, occasionally looking up and nodding at David's stories of the day.

Maybe she's tired still from the traveling thought David, he couldn't help but think she was hiding something, perhaps she was regretting coming back, after all, hell would probably be a happier place to live than here.

"Carol" he started "can I um ask you something? I just want you to be honest with me"

Carol glanced up, he couldn't make out what her expression meant.

"um you've been very... Quiet" he stuttered "is it because of me? Have I done something wrong?" he questioned.

"why is everything always about you!" spat Carol slamming down her knife and fork "Your so fucking selfish!" she continued before pushing the plate away and storming off.

"Mmm more food for me" chuckled David scraping the content of her plate onto his own before demolishing the remaining food.

After cleaning up after himself he headed upstairs where carol lay fully clothed on the bed, slipping his jacket off he shot her a cheesy smile, to his suprised she bit her bottom lip and smiled back.

Another change in mood, thought David as he walked over to the bed and lay beside her.

She turned to him and ran her fingers over his lips before kissing him passionatly.

David couldn't take it any more. Carols teasing was driving him crazy, he dragged her towards him and leapt on top of her.

"I want you so much darling" he whispered, a tone of sexual need in his voice, he began kissing her lips then moved slowly over her cheek and neck, they carefully peeled each others clothes off, His solid throbbing cock slid straight inside her.

His full weight was now pushing her into the bed as he pumped into her pussy though her spread, opened legs.

Her hands roamed his back as her nails started to find their mark. This just heightened their lust and want for each other, they both let out soft groans as david picked up his pace.

He needed to be in her, right inside her.

"ohh carol" groaned David as he withdrew his erection only to slide his full length of man meat back in only seconds later.

"ohhh fuck me David! Fuck me hard" she screamed tugging violently at his hair.

The two soon climaxed together before falling asleep in each others arms.

The following morning David stood looking out of the window, he spotted Phil conga-ing around the square with a row of wheelie bins trailing behind him, he chuckled and shook his head "maybe I should drink more" he muttered glancing back at Carol who was now bent over the bed sorting the sheets out.

"ohh carol have i ever told you what a fantastic arse you?" questioned David with a smug grin spread across his face.

She turned and smiled as she walked over, snaking her arms around his waist, David sighed "you know sweetheart we need to get ourselves settled somewhere, we can't keep running on dreams" said David in a tone full of uncertainty.

"dreams are all we have left David" was Carol's reply before she walked away holding her tummy, then bolting to the bathroom to be sick.

David was confused by this, Carol hadn't mentioned feeling ill, he put his hand over his mouth for a moment, perhaps carol was hiding something from him? Could it be that the cancer was back?

He shrugged away the terrible throught and knocked the bathroom door "darling are you alright there?" he called.

"go away!" was the abrupt response.

Carol continued to throw up for a number of minutes before all was quiet, David was patiently waiting outside, a few more minutes past and he heard a moan from inside the bathroom followed by the words "oh shit".

...

That's all for chapter two my lovelies, hope you enjoyed reading! Please let me know what you thought.

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	3. Chapter 3

Welcome to chapter three people, I hope your all enjoying what you've read so far, please let me know in the comments if you have the time.

Chapter 3

Carol wanted to cry, but she couldn't cry, she needed to think and think clearly, her hands trembled as she glared down at the pregnancy test.

The test was positive.

How could this be? She was sure she couldn't get pregnant, because of her age and not to mention her cancer treatment, she stood up holding onto the sink and staring at her reflection in the mirror.

She could see the sweat breaking out on her forehead, her mouth was dry, she could sense David was stood on the other side of that door waiting for her.

She had had suspicions for a couple of months, she hadn't been feeling well but had just assumed it was the start of the menopause.

She glanced at the test again praying she had been mistaken, just praying there was one blue line and not two, but it was no good, no amount of prayers could change the result, there were definitely two blue lines.

The baby was David's no doubt about that, she hadn't been with anyone else and they had never been careful.

The words 'get rid of it' whizzed through her head, she was sure that if she confided in Sonia, Bianca or even David that would be their advice.

In fact she was sure if she told David he would be high tailing it out the door quicker than a toupee being whisked away in a hurricane.

"Are you ok in there darling?" it was David banging on the door.

Carol opened her mouth, it would only take a matter of seconds to say 'no David, I need you, help me, I'm pregnant' for a split second she was almost ready to open the door and fall into David's arms, but something stopped her.

"I'm fine" she called "il be out soon I'm just about to have a shower"

Seconds later she heard David grunting to himself and heading down the stairs.

She eventually ventured down where David had prepared some breakfast for her.

"ello darling, your just in time I was about to eat yours" he chuckled pushing the plate over.

"no thanks, you can have it, I'm not hungry" said Carol pouring herself some orange juice.

"but you've hardly eaten recently you must be starving" answered David with a look of concern.

"I said I'm not fucking hungry!" screamed carol bolting up and launching the half empty glass in David's direction "just leave me alone!"

David had fortunately managed to duck before the flying glass made contact with his head "anger is one letter short of danger" he muttered deciding to leave her be.

He couldn't understand what he had done wrong, normally there was something he could pinpoint but not this time, he knew not to get into a war of words with carol when she was like this, after all the woman did hold all the aces.

He sat thinking of times gone by, his life had been some what eventful, women were a big part of it, he couldn't deal with commitment, he had lived with a number of women over the years.

He pictured them all, waiting up for him to return home, striding back and forth across the living room, just waiting, wondering where he was.

In his heart of hearts he knew sooner or later he would have to get use to being alone, although he was quite slow on the uptake, over the years the feelings of loneliness had darkened a few days.

He stood up and looked into the long hallway which led upto the front door, he stood for a long time, remembering, remembering the happy times he had here, it was in this corridor he gave Bianca the money to get Carol's wedding dress.

He smiled at the thought, he remembered sneaking Christmas presents in and hiding them under the stairs, he remembered standing proudly with his arm around carol when her illness was degrading her.

Looking into the darkness it was like a these scenes were playing out in front of him.

He went and sat back at the kitchen table, slamming his hands down hard his right hand caught a fork "ahhh bastard!" he whined "oh, sodding thing!"

"You want some cheese and crackers to go with that whine?" said Carol as she entered the room.

David winced and moved over to the sink to run his bleeding hand under the cold tap "you come back to scream at me again?" he asked glancing over at her.

She shrugged and shook her head "I'm going out with the girls" she told him "don't wait up"

She was gone as quick as she came.

David nursed his throbbing hand and grabbed a bottle of whisky, perhaps carol expected him to follow her, who knows... It was clear tonight no questions were going to be answered...

...

Thank you for reading guys, please review or comment if you can, more coming soon.

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	4. Chapter 4

Eastenders chapter 4

Hello people thanks for coming back, here is chapter four, hope you enjoy it.

Chapter four.

" like the view from a hill,

I can see you and me,

Like the view from a hill it's so easy to see,

Here's where we belong, I feel it so strong, I see it so clear, as I always will.

Like the view from a hill.

Like a bird in the sky, I can see us below.

As it all passes by,

I believe that I know,

This feeling of love seen from above,

Goes on and on, as it always will...

Like the view from a hill...

One day you may want to know,

Where did our short lives go,

How soon will it end,

How strong can it grow,

Like the view from a hill,

I can see through the tears,

Like the view from a hill,

I can see down the years,

Here's where we belong, I see it so strong,

I see it so clear,

As I always will...

Like the view from a hill..."

David kept singing and playing his guitar, stopping occasionally to chug some whisky, it was now 5 in the morning "ohhh" he groaned placing the guitar in the corner and moving his song words from the table, he glanced at them and shook head.

Unbeknown to him carol had heard every word, she was stood outside grinning to herself, she of course was full of mixed emotions, but listening to David's sweet voice seemed to make her forget about her worries for a short time.

She walked into the living room where David was just polishing off the remainder of the whisky.

"Your going to have a terrible headache in the morning" informed carol as she sat beside him.

David glanced over and shrugged "it's already morning" he answered emptying the glass into his mouth.

"David, um do you remember when you first found out about Bianca?" asked Carol sitting up straight.

David turned and smiled "how could I forget?"

"well how did you feel?" she continued.

"well I was shocked of course, but I suppose everything turned out alright in the end didn't it?" was David plain and vague answer.

"would you have ever wanted more children with me?" she asked trying not to sound to serious.

David looked at her and chuckled "I've never thought about it Carol" he replied continuing to find her question amusing "eh imagine if it happened now, now that would be funny" he laughs before walking off into the kitchen.

Carol sat there rubbing her tummy, maybe she should tell David now about the baby, that would wipe the smug look off his face.

She soon heard Davids voice echo through the house "I'm going shopping darling" he called before heading out the front door.

"shopping" muttered Carol "more like your going out looking for a new fancy piece" she knew her comment was unfair, she knew David had changed, but she also knew she could never fully trust him, after all he was a man and not just any man.

"ah you little git!" the yell came from outside, Carol bolted up and looked out the window only to see David shouting and waving his arms about at a group of children, one of the children was Denny, Carol chuckles as she watches.

"try and aim that football away from other life forms!" he growled walking off into the distance.

Carol sighed and took herself off to bed, she slept almost instantly, she didn't expect to sleep, she had been sure the fear, the uncertainty about her future would keep her awake and alert, yet, she slept perfectly.

She woke just as David had returned from his shopping trip, it was now near four in the afternoon, she was suprised at how long she had been asleep, for some reason she didn't want to move, but she had to, she had agreed to meet Bianca, this unfortunately meant getting the tube, something Carol hated.

She couldn't stand the underground, the crowds, sounds and smells, the unnerving swoosh of wind that came from the tunnel with every train as if it was going to pull her under and carry her off.

As she entered the tube she glanced around, it was rush hour and not surprisingly every seat was taken, there was hardly any room to stand up, with tubes people seemed to think there's always room for one more passenger. Hardly! Carol thought.

She was constantly afraid she wouldn't be able to fight her way out when it came to her stop.

When she reached ground level again she took a few moments to rest and breath in the fresh air, when she was ready to move on she headed to the cafe where it was agreed herself and Bianca would meet.

Bianca hadn't yet arrived so she found a nice table in the corner and waited patiently, she planned to tell her daughter the news, she felt on the verge of tears but managed to choke them back.

Whatever would Bianca say, would she be pleased? Shocked? Disappointed? Perhaps she would have a mix of emotions, all Carol hoped for was for some positive advice, part of her wanted Bianca to scream and shout, tell her to rid of it, but another part of her couldn't help think that this baby could be a blessing.

Bianca soon arrived "oh it's freezing out there" she spluttered plonking herself down in front of her mother.

"don't I get a cuddle?"

Bianca smiled and leaned over the table to embrace her "so what's the emergency?" she questioned "you sounded worried on the phone"

Carol took a deep breath before speaking "sweetheart, this might come as a bit of a shock to you, it certainly did to me"

Bianca sat back in her seat, she wore a confused but concerned look upon her face "oh please no its not the cancer is it?"

Carol shook her head "no, no its nothing like that, I've found out that I'm pregnant"

Bianca glared blankly at her mother, this had to be some sort of joke "how did that happen?" she muttered.

"well I'm sure I don't need to draw you a diagram" spat Carol.

"I meant how is it possible, after the chemo, the cancer after everything and then there's your age, it's impossible" said Bianca.

"clearly it's not impossible" answered Carol fiddling with her napkin.

The pair sat in silence for what seemed like hours.

"who's is it?" Bianca eventually asked, her tone of voice deflated, an element of sadness and disappointment emanating from her.

"Bianca! It's your dad's baby of course! What do you think I am!"

"still together then? You've not sent him away again?" it was clear Bianca was still hurt by the whole wedding day aftermath.

"no, we talked alot when I tracked him down, we are fine" muttered Carol, of course this wasn't quite true, her and David were never 'fine' things were either really good or extremely bad, deep down Carol knew the mention of a baby would make David run a mile...

Hope you enjoyed that guys, please let me know what you think if you have the time. Thanks for reading.

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	5. Chapter 5

Hello people, sorry it's taken a while to get this chapter up, hope you like it.

Chapter 5

Carol returned home late, herself and Bianca had had a long discussion about the situation in hand, and carol still had no clue as to what to do.

"where have you been?" questioned David popping his head round the door.

"oh um I went to meet Bianca we had alot of catching up to do" informed Carol with a yawn.

David glanced at his watch "it's almost one in the morning, if it was me strolling in at this time you would skin me and hang my bones out to dry"

Carol shot him a look and walked past him "been up to much?" she questioned.

"No, nothing out of the ordinary, my life doesn't lend itself to events" he replied briskly.

Carol shrugged her shoulders and headed up to bed, David was clearly in one of his sarcastic moods, she fell asleep almost immediately, her sleep was broken and restless, her mind just wouldn't stop torturing her.

She woke just in time to see David appear with a tray.

On it were two mugs and jug of milk along with a bowl of sugar "good morning sweetheart" said David with a smile as he layed the tray on Carol's lap "I thought we could have a nice cup of tea together then pop over the cafe for breakfast?"

Carol wasn't really in the mood to go out but she accepted the tea.

They sat in silence sipping away, Carol's glare was fixed on the wall in front of her, she knew she didn't need David, she could do this all by herself, she could leave and go somewhere new, when and if she ever saw David again she would be totally independent and looking after her baby.

She shook the thought away, her brain was being completely irrational.

She placed the mug on the bedside table and moved the tray, she closed her eyes feeling tired again.

David got the hint and left pretty quickly.

He didn't have a clue what was wrong with Carol and now it was starting to worry him.

That wasn't the only thing that was worrying him, he appeared to be coming down with something, his throat was killing him and he ached all over, of course he didn't expect any sympathy from Carol, certainly not while she was in this mood.

He managed to string the day out till late afternoon, he then ventured back home praying Carol would be in a better mood, walking quietly through the door he glanced ahead and saw her pottering about the kitchen.

Smiling to himself he wandered in and slips his arms round her waist "not now David" spat Carol pulling away from him "dinners at nine I know that's late but tuff shit I've been very busy today" she continued shoving him out the way.

"busy? Oh right" muttered David watching Carol do everything she could to avoid eye contact.

"Sweetheart is something wrong? Have I upset you?" he enquired.

"no" she grumbled setting the table "just leave it David I've a headache"

David shrugged and Watched as Carol laid out the knives, forks, place mats etc, there was definitely something on her mind but what could it possibly be?

Davids head was spinning, when his lady was like this it made him feel ill, usually the simple cure was another lair of female hands, he shook his head and headed to the back door "Carol I'm just going to the garden, I've some slugs and snails to show around the place"

He had hoped his statement might raise a smile, but sadly he was wrong, all he got was a death stare.

He sighed and headed out, lit a cigarette and sat in a quiet corner, for some reason Carol was the one that always brought his deepest and darkest thoughts and emotions to the surface.

Over the last few months he had realised, by continuously trying to help people with things, being the nice guy and then running away really meant he wasn't a strong person at all.

He wasn't running from them he was running from himself, finding somewhere new where nobody knew him, so nobody could judge and he could always start again.

He always ran from himself.

Finishing the cigarette he started chuckling at himself.

He wasn't quite sure what he found so amusing at this point, he took a breath and walked back in, groaning as he sat down at the table.

"Carol darling, can I help with anything?" he asked with a smile.

She just stared at him for a moment.

"you've been smoking, I can smell it, it's disgusting* she spat

David rolled his eyes before replying to her in his now raspy tone "it was just the one no big deal"

"yeah right, well I'm sure that will help your bad throat won't it"

David narrowed his eyes, this was a clear indication this evening was going to go anything but smoothly.

"Carol please I'm really not feeling well, I'm getting the flu" he muttered angling for sympathy.

Oh course carol had seen him like this a hundred times before, she certainly wasn't up for dishing out hugs and kisses at the moment, all she really wanted to do was strangle him, she had come to realise she the more he was around her the more he seemed to irritate her.

"oh just go to bed" she snapped unable to control herself.

David didn't bother answering, he took himself for a shower and then went straight to bed, a few hours later he felt worse than ever.

All he wanted to do was cuddle up to carol, she made him feel safe especially when he wasn't to well.

Carol eventually appeared, thw silent treatment was still afoot, as she slipped into bed and turned away from David, he took the opportunity to snake his arm round her, only to be pushed away "sweetheart please I'm not well I just want..." he coughed before continuing "oh I just want some comfort"

Carol flipped over to face him, he could see she didn't look amused.

"men, it's never a cold it's the flu, it's never a tummy ache it's food poisoning, it's never a headache it's a brain tumor" muttered Carol watching David cough and cuddle the bed sheets.

"what the hell is your problem today?" he questioned "you've been in a right mood what's wrong? Perhaps I can help"

"help!" screamed carol being upright "you can't help!it's your fucking fault!"

David looked confused, he was pretty sure he hadn't done anything to upset her, at least not recently, well not to get her this heated up.

"what have I done this time!?" he said trying to remain calm.

"David I'm fucking pregnant! You've made me pregnant!" she yelled jumping out of bed and vacating the room, slamming the door behind her...

Thanks for reading people, if you can then leave a comment etc il try and post more regularly, just been busy of late!?

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	6. Chapter 6

Hello again people here is chaper six, I still don't believe this story is one of my best but I definitely will get the chapers out a little quicker from now on, let me know what you think if you have the time. Enjoy people.

Chapter 6

Davids jaw dropped "pregnant!" he managed to utter in a high pitched tone, he couldn't believe it, she couldn't be pregnant, it just didn't make any sense.

Its amazing how fast the mind can think when one is in shock, David thought about him and carol when they were kids, he thought about all the women he had been with, even thoughts of his own funeral started racing through his mind.

"pregnant" he muttered to himself multiple times, he had heard correctly hadn't he? Could have said something else? Could he have gone temporally deaf and missed a few words from her sentence?

Of course deep down he knew he had heard her loud and clear, it certainly explained why she had been in such a bad mood recently.

He tried to relax himself, his mind was on its arse, when he tried to focus on one single thought another seemed to jump in, how in world was he ever going to get out of this mess? He was to old to be looking after a child, he enjoyed his cosy carefree goodnights sleep!

He lay there for a while unsure what to do, attempting to talk to carol at the moment was not a bright idea, he patiently waited for the front door to slam, fortunately for him he didn't have to wait long.

He pulled himself out of bed and looked out the window, he saw Carol racing across the square, he let out a sigh.

To ease the situation perhaps he should leave for a whole, let the whole thing sink in?

He shook his head "David, David, David no, no more running away" he muttered to himself.

For years this had been the pattern for him, as soon as things get remotely serious he took to the high Road, he would run away.

Deep down he knew Carol questioned his loyalty towards her, he couldn't blame her.

He lay back down on top of the bed covers "perhaps this could work" he muttered, he often spoke to himself, occasionally he managed to get a half decent solution to the problem, but this wasn't any ordinary problem, this was a baby, a life...

Elsewhere Carol had gone to the cafe in the hope someone would walk in she could poor her heart out too,her hopes were answered in the form of Buster,no exacly the person she had in mind.

"ello Carol, sitting alone?" he asked with a cheeky smile plonking himself down in front of her "you should try the eggs i can't resist a good egg sandwich" he chuckled.

Carol glared at him trying to raise a smile "Buster I'm pregnant" she blurted out, her eyes fixed on him.

"good lord at your age... I mean well done" was the unflattering reply.

"it's David's, when I told him earlier he wasn't happy, I could tell, he hates me!" she sobbed, she soon felt a comforting arm around her shoulder, Buster smelt of expensive aftershave, his comforting touch was calming.

"I'm sure he is just in shock, I don't know the bloke but at your age it must be a shock, and what with the treatments you've had and..."

"Buster shut up!" snapped Carol, she didn't appreciate her age or past woes being brought up.

Buster retreated back to his seat "so what are you going do?"

Carol glanced up and shrugged before getting up and leaving without speaking a word, she headed home, she knew David wouldn't be there now, maybe he wouldn't come back.

She began her daily routine of tidying the living room, give it a dust and vacuum.

As she worked alone the house seemed unnaturally quiet, she could hear a group of people laughing outside, she flicked television on, maybe the news would keep her mind off her own problems.

Unfortunately it did the opposite,the news seemed to be full of headlines involving pregnant women, she flicked the channel over a few times but it was no use she couldn't clear her head.

"over 100 channels and it's still all depressing" she muttered, she made herself a sandwich and began checking her phone, seven messages received.

She flicked the screen to bring her inbox up, they were all from David, she was pleasantly suprised however she also had a feeling dread rushing through her body, what if these were fair well messages?

She clicked the first one

CAROL CAN YOU CALL ME WHEN YOU GET THIS MESSAGE X

she clicked on the next one.

SWEETHEART I KNOW MY REACTION TO YOUR NEWS WASN'T WHAT EXPECTED I WAS IN SHOCK.

"in shock!" she screamed at the device "how the fuck you think I felt you slimy weasel!

CAROL THIS IS SILLY YOU DONT NEED TO IGNORE ME WE CAN SORT THIS OUT.

Carol frowned at the phone" sort it out, that only means one thing he wants me to get rid of it"

OK CAROL YOU WIN, TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO, I DONT HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS.

She was tempted to send a message back to this one but she held back.

CAROL PLEASE WE NEED TO TALK IM HEADING BACK NOW, PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU ARE THERE, YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU, THIA COYLD BE GOOD FOR US XXXXXX

She narrowed her eyes a tad confused at what was typed before her, perhaps he wanted her to keep the baby, or perhaps he was feeling guilty about something, she checked the time the message was sent, it was over two hours ago.

"that can't ve right" she spluttered checking her watch again "where on earth is he?" she read the final messages which all contained kisses, hitting the speed dial for David's number she began to panic, David was never a very good time keeper but the message sounded sincere, how could he be that far away?

The call went straight to the answerphone, so was that it? Had he done a runner? Maybe the battery was flat or maybe something terrible had happened...

There we go people I hope you enjoyed it, more coming soon, please review if you have the time.

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	7. Chapter 7

Hello again people, welcome back here is chapter seven, hope you enjoy it! Please review if you can.

Chapter 7

Carol sat alone in the living area fidgeting with her phone, all she really wanted right now for David to call or text again "come on for fuck sake" she sobbed starting to feel herself go into panic mode, she began to shake.

"oh David where are you!" she screamed, she was never normally this emotional, it wasn't uncommon for David to be late home, deep down she knew she was worrying over nothing, in fact she wasn't to sure what she was worried about. She knew she didn't need David, with the amount of times they had split up they should have a place in the book of Guinness world records.

She flicked on the tv and gasped as a picture of what looked like David's car flashed up on the screen, she leaned closers trying to take in what the news reporter was saying, the car looked a wreck, there were two casualties both unknown and both pronounced dead at the scene.

"oh god oh no David!" cried Carol as she heard the door slam.

"Carol you in" came a familiar voice from the hallway "Carol!" hello"

Carol bolted up, she knew that voice anywhere, she raced into the hall and into David's arms "David I thought you were dead!" she announced as she held him tightly sobbing into his chest.

"well this is a change from this morning" chuckled David wrapping his arms round her.

Carol held him tightly sobbing uncontrollably as she did so "I never want to lose you, first I thought you had left me then I saw that on the news and..."

"hey hey hey carol it's ok" interrupted David giving her a little squeeze "I didn't know pregnancy could be so stressful for a woman, you just need to relax"

Carol pulled back and shot him a death stare "relax! Fucking relax! Your hardly the most reliable man on this planet! Your hardly the most understanding! You've never been there for a pregnant woman! Your not capable!" she snapped following up with a firm slap "get out! Get out of my house!" she wailed hitting, shoving and sobbing "get out you sorry excuse of a man!"

David backed away as carol kept hitting, he held his arms up around his head to try and soften the blows as carol kept on screaming at him.

"stay away from me and my baby" she said giving one final shove sending David arse over tit into a pile of bin bags.

He lay there watching carol hurry away back into the house.

"what did I say!" he managed to choke.

"Wicks, no point looking in those bin bags, there's nothing good i already looked" came the drunken voice of Phil as he stumbled past clutching a bottle of vodka under his arm.

David grunted and started brushing himself down looking over at the house, he stared up at the open bedroom window 'well in the end the chances we never took are the ones we regret the most' he thought heading over eyeing up a drain pipe "right" he muttered grabbing on slowly pulling himself.

"bastard" came Carol's voice from inside along with the echos of glass smashing.

David stopped where he was holding on tightly as his suitcase flew through the window.

"Carol!"he wailed feeling slightly afraid now, he was half way up the side of the house gripping a drain pipe that felt like it was going to crumble at any moment.

"Carol calm down!" he pleaded as his worldly possessions flew past him onto the ground below.

The pipe began shaking "oh shit" he mumbled before it sent him hurtling towards the ground...

Luckily his fall was broken by a pile of suits of which carol had kindly tossed out the window.

"ohh" he groaned "I really need to lose weight"

He struggled up flicking bits of dirt off his shirt, there is a special time late in the year before the cold raw nights of winter set in, when it's still warm enough to go outside and feel the darkness... This was that time, he had nowhere to go, he didn't want to leave he wanted to be here for carol.

It seemed she had different ideas.

He didn't bother to gather his things, most of it was wrecked now anyway.

It's so easy to take your partner for granted, not consciously perhaps, and of course not in the sense that you don't value them but maybe that comes with the territory? You try not to spend to much time thinking ahead to a time where life could alter dramatically,like in death, or in this case an unexpected baby on the way.

David limped around the square slowly in the settling darkness, all sorts of questions and scenarios racing through his mind, he answered with his subconscious, nothing was really registering, he was scared, and he regretted climbing that drain pipe, his knee was stinging, but he didn't think it was anything serious.

All the reassurance and positive words he spoke to himself didn't change his spinning mind, but he knew one thing, now was the time to stop running, now was the time to prove himself to Carol...

There you go people thank you for reading, hopefully you enjoyed it!

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	8. Chapter 8

Hello people here is chapter, please review or comment if you can, hope your enjoying it so far.

Chapter 8

David had booked into a hotel just outside the square, he had held off as long as possible hoping carol would calm down and ask him to come home, but as the clock struck midnight she still hadn't been in touch.

He lay in bed trying to make a plan, he had never felt so lonely, although he was use to sleeping alone, during the rare nights he had spent in the same bed as carol in the past few months he would often lye awake, disconcerted by her presence and unsettled by his fitful dreams.

He lay there thinking, analysing everything, when he throught about it, he and carol had never really discussed thier situation properly, they were together but so far apart, deep down he sometimes throught it was just routine for him and carol.

But it always seemed to work, they rarely spoke like the typical lovers of the world did, no argument was ever settled, it was brushed under the carpet and the make up sex made it all worth it, and of course things worked out.

He lay there thinking about how sometimes in life things get lost or messed up, time flies by and you don't realise how much time passes, you spend your life chasing rainbows, he wondered if real love and happiness even existed, if it was ever really possible.

He learnt alot about his random thoughts, he learned that memories are a way of holding onto the things you love and things you are, the things you pray to never lose - that was carol to him.

He knew she was the making of him, from moment he saw her he knew he loved her, but he was just to scared to accept it.

He realised that in a world that changes to fast the best he could do was make everyday worth living, make everyday a day to remember, make a proper life for himself and carol.

He smiled to himself and flicked through pictures on his phone, him and carol looked great together, he started to feel some movement in his boxers, he always got semi hard when carol was on his mind.

He moans to himself and slips his hand into his boxers, he really wanted carol to be here, right by his side, holding him, kissing him, just her tender touch would be enough.

He began massaging his balls. Squeezing them, his cock getting harder, he wanted her here lay beside him, maybe he could drive the seven miles back to the square or even walk, just seeing her smile would be worth it.

But he knew she wouldn't be smiling, she had made it clear yet again she wasn't interested, when he throught about it, it was always her that seemed to end things, of course he himself wasn't completely innocent.

He moved his hand over his fully erect cock letting out a moan as he squeezed it, his mind was spinning with images of carol racing through it "ohh carol" he groaned as he gripped his manhood tightly moving his hand slowly up and down.

Pre cum covered his hand as he pleasured himself, he wanted carol sat in front of him watching, wanting him, needing his hard cock inside her, he wanked himself faster, he was approaching orgasm so he slowed down licking the pre spunk of his fingers and rubbing it into his nipples.

Looking at his phone again he flicked to pictures of carol, he smiled "ohh I want you" he muttered as he continued to pick up pace "ahh carol" he cried covering his his hand in hot sticky spunk.

His heart was racing, he lay there for a few minutes as his breathing returned to normal, he grabbed a quick shower and headed out, there was no way he could possibly sleep with so much on his mind, he kept thinking about the baby.

It was so unexpected, a miracle, perhaps some kind of sign.

He drove around all night, pulling up in a quiet street close to the square, it was late afternoon before he woke, he felt dreadful, his neck was killing him after sleeping in an awkward position.

Without thinking to much he got out the car and walked the few miles round to Carol's place, letting himself in no plan of what to expect or what to say.

Carol appeard in the kitchen doorway "what the fuck are you doing here?" She yelled.

David found himself lost for words.

"Well?" Spat carol placing her hands on her hips.

"The baby, we could make things work, maybe it's just what we need" stuttered David.

"I'm worked off my feet and I'm too old! The last thing on god's earth I need right now is a baby, I've enough trouble dealing with you!"

"Um well yes maybe your right" answered David sounding unconvinced, he would argue black was white at this moment, he just wanted her back.

They lapsed into silence again, carol struggling to deal with all the possible implications of what had been said, she wanted to keep the baby and she now knew David did too, but she could see he wanted her to keep it for the wrong reasons, letting him know she had no plan of aborting it would be a bad move.

"I should have been here for you when you were pregnant with Bianca" muttered David.

So was that his plan, does he see this as a chance to right his wrongs?

Carol folded her arms and looked at him.

"Can't change the past" she said expecting a long winded speech.

They always seemed to be acting out their pasts, they couldn't help it.

"You fucking left me!" Screamed carol "we were supposed to be getting married and you decided to have a heart attack!" Of course she knew her statement was true but totally unfair.

David was speechless, he stood looking at her in disbelief "I didn't plan it! You've no idea what I sent through that day!" He snapped back "it was you that told me to leave. I didn't want to" he continued trying to fight his corner.

"No I told you to go back to the hospital, I needed time, I'd have calmed down!"

Now this could have been true, but somehow David doubted it, it was clear that day that like so many other days carol had made up her mind, he walked towards her as she began backing away, she moved behind the table.

"Carol please, can't we at least talk about this?" David had that pleading look about him.

Carol shoved the table hard towards him, upending glasses and sending plates clattering onto the floor.

"Get out David, and don't even think about trying to call me, I don't want to know!"

She matched past him up to the bathroom, slammed the door hard and locked it, suddenly not caring if she ever saw him again...

Hope you guys enjoyed reading, please comment or review if you can.

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